What a lovely way to start the day with singing. Ben has been singing and playing his guitar - a joyful start to the day. I struggle with the fact that I am not a good Mum at the moment. Our lives are so centred around my illness and treatment and it makes everything revolve around me. I miss just being a normal mum.

Yesterday was another good day. I cooked breakfast (making the most of being able to eat) and cooked tea for the first time in ages. I had coffee with a friend and looked at her beautiful holiday photos. In the afternoon I went out to Holme Grange ( a craft village locally) where we sat outside eating ice cream - yummy!

Today I have dialysis which another friend is taking me to. I am so grateful to all my friends who fill my life. Thank you.

Tomorrow chemo number 5 - ho hum.