Not all doom and gloom

Sorry for my lack of writing this week. I had hoped to be writing of recovery but it has been a very up and down week. My back remains very much the same and seems to have settled into a constant hum of pain which, although helped slightly by painkillers, never goes away. It limits so much that I do and is frustrating. I am unreliable as I can never tell whether any day is going to be a good day or a bad one. I am sure all this isn't helped by the length of time I have now been particularly unwell this time. I started methotrexate at the beginning of December - so 4 1/2 months ago, and it is now 5 years since my hands first starting swelling. Wow! Chronic illness is so hard to cope with because it changes your life. Some days it is really hard to think that I am only 54 not 104!!!!! 
However there are many moments of sunshine and although my writing above makes it sound as if all is doom and gloom I have so much to be thankful for. Paul patiently cares for me - never complaining as he cooks tea again! My family support and love me. My friends bring laughter and news into my days through texts, emails and visits. My church family are committed to praying for me - despite my many requests. I have lots to look forward to - tomorrow a visit to the ballet in London with Paul, Ed and Chloe ( all being well), Chloe's hen party next weekend, wedding planning ( we are onto the nitty gritty details now), wedding dress and mother-ofthebride dress trying on, maybe hat buying, Chelsea flower show...... Etc. I have gone back to using my wheelchair a bit when I need to walk any distance ( good exercise for Paul) which makes more things possible and gets me out of these walls. On good days I can drive too which helps. I have also been loving my swing seat in the sunshine- even if I have needed my quilt to keep warm. Our garden is looking lovely - I so love the spring colours which God uses to paint the gardens with. 
As ever thank you for your emails, texts, messages and visits - I love hearing about your lives.